It's time for our annual Plastic Globe awards, as we reflect on the past year and salute those deserving parties who helped make 2000 unforgettable.
RUPAUL GENDER-BUSTER AWARD — To consulting house Dun & Bradstreet Corp. In a survey of its database listing top women-owned plastics companies, the No. 1 perch went to Foamex International Inc. and its chairwoman, Andrea Farace. Unfortunately, further investigation revealed that Farace, now gone from Foamex, is a man.
NO VALUE ADDED AWARD — To a New Milford, Conn., outfit called Federal Investment Group, which issued a news release Jan. 1 offering the Web domain name PlasticInjectionMolding.Com for sale for a mere $12 million. No content included, mind you — just the Web address. As of Dec. 8, the firm was still offering this "landmark domain name" for auction, now starting at $6 million.
BETTER EAT YOUR WHEATIES AWARD — To Dynisco HotRunners, for employing someone with the title of "Global Automotive Business Champion."
PAY NO ATTENTION TO THE MAN BEHIND THE CURTAIN AWARD — To the unidentified man who, in the midst of auto plant shutdowns, layoffs, firings, delayed payments and earnings warnings in December, was overheard on a cell phone advising someone that there really was no slowdown. "This happens every December. ... Just watch. ... Everything is fine. ... It's a great time to do business." The whole conversation took place while he sat in the clerk's office at Detroit's U.S. Bankruptcy Court.
UP IN SMOKE AWARD — To Johnson Controls Inc. and development partner Indiana Bio-Composites LLC, who managed to get hemp into a car door as part of a plastic and natural-fiber substrate, without setting off smoke signals to the Drug Enforcment Agency.
MANHUNTER OF THE YEAR AWARD — To Emeric Szalay, owner of resin distributor Northern Polymers Inc. in Plymouth, Ind. Szalay's dogged pursuit of a $95,000 debt owed him by injection molder General Plastics of Michigan led to the arrest of General Plastics owner B. Patrick Healy at Healy's Stevensville, Mich., home Oct. 13. Szalay's efforts included numerous calls to local law enforcement agencies and culminated when he alerted authorities after spotting Healy's car at the residence the day of the arrest. Criminal charges were dropped in late November when Healy agreed to pay Szalay roughly half of what he owed. Szalay defended his tactics in a late September interview by saying, "For a small guy like me, (not paying) is punching you right where it counts."
WHAT THE PUCK AWARD — To the owners of extrusion giant Crane Plastics Holding Co. of Columbus, Ohio, who bought a minority stake in the Columbus Blue Jackets, a start-up National Hockey League team.
WHO'S MY MOMMA? AWARD — To German machinery behemoth Mannesmann Plastics Machinery AG, whose ownership saga's latest twist occurred last month, when parent Siemens AG revealed plans to sell the business just months after indicating it would keep it for at least three years.
HOT STORY AWARD — To Kerr Group Inc. plant manager Julian Stewart, whose Sept. 19 interview at the firm's Jackson, Tenn., plant with PN correspondent Roger Renstrom was interrupted when the facility caught fire. No one was hurt, but Renstrom has not been invited to any plants since.
AL GORE EGYPTIAN HIEROGLYPHICS AWARD FOR INSCRUTABILITY — To the bevy of statements from plastics industry dot-coms, most of which put politicians to shame for their talent with jargon. In dot-com speak, the companies tout their ability to leverage online technologies, pursue partnerships in infrastructure, offer value propositions and become best-of-breed solution providers. Why not say they plan to sell resin?
GLOBAL VILLAGE AIN'T MY KIND OF TOWN AWARD — To one California mold maker on a Society of the Plastics Industry Inc.-sponsored trade mission to Southeast Asia in January. During a tour of a tool shop on the outskirts of Shenzhen, China, with about 15 of his colleagues, he suddenly gasped in horror while looking at a mold being finished. "Hey, we bid on that job," he said. The rest of his statement cannot be printed in a family newspaper.
RUPAUL GENDER-BUSTER AWARD — To consulting house Dun & Bradstreet Corp. In a survey of its database listing top women-owned plastics companies, the No. 1 perch went to Foamex International Inc. and its chairwoman, Andrea Farace. Unfortunately, further investigation revealed that Farace, now gone from Foamex, is a man.
RESIN IN THE VEINS AWARD — To General Electric Corp., for finally finding a replacement for ex-GE Plastics guy Jack Welch as chairman and chief executive officer — another ex-plastics guy, Jeffery Immelt.
PAPER OR PLASTIC AWARD — To election officials across the United States, who got to explain all the drawbacks of using paper punchcards to decide the next president of the United States. Next time, let's vote for plastic.
GOOD WORKERS ARE HARD TO FIND AWARD — To Plastech Corp., which addressed its labor shortage by employing some 50 prisoners in the Minnesota Rush City Correctional Facility to do minimum-wage assembly work. (Kinda makes you wonder where they'll hold the company Christmas party.)
BETTER BACKGROUND CHECK AWARD — To American Louver Co. The company found out through an anonymous telephone call that its recently hired vice president of operations would not be returning from a requested leave of absence for awhile: He was, in fact, serving an 18-month prison term for charges related to defrauding a former company.
NICE NAME, COMRADE, AWARD — To Communisis plc, a British packaging concern.
ARNOLD SCHWARZNEGGER I'LL BE BACK AWARD — To Jeffrey Garwood, former chief operating officer of Commerx Inc. The ex-GE Plastics executive handed Commerx CEO Tim Stojka his letter of resignation in October. Then, two weeks later, Garwood was named Commerx interim CEO after Stojka resigned that position. Then, Garwood said he would throw his hat in the ring for the permanent CEO slot at Commerx ... or he'd walk away again if he didn't get it. On Dec. 7, Commerx named David O'Meara, vice president of business development, as the new CEO. So, Garwood walked away. The hinges on Garwood's office door must need oiling from the workout they're getting.
SPINMEISTER AWARD — To Owens Corning spokesman Bill Hamilton who, when his firm filed for bankruptcy protection because of asbestos-related payouts expected to exceed $5 billion, predicted: "It shouldn't have any impact on us at all."
GET A WHIFF OF THIS AWARD — To Textron Automotive Co. for the work it has done in developing aromatically enhanced automotive instrument panels. Potpourri, anyone?
BARGAIN BASEMENT AWARD — To the once-mighty Tucker Housewares and Zeta Consumer Products Corp. Some of the bankrupt companies' assets were purchased by an online trading company, which resold them days later to a discount-store chain that owns Hudson's Dirt Cheap.
CAN I BE A LOSER, TOO? AWARD — To JJM LLC and Carlyle Management Group, competing bidders for the assets of bankrupt automotive molder Key Plastics. The courts ruled that the losing bidder gets $1.25 million to help cover expenses, or that either firm pockets a mere $750,000 if it withdraws from the bidding voluntarily. Not bad work, if you can get it.
FORMICA DREAM HOUSE AWARD — To the National Trust for Historic Preservation, which honored Ralph Wilson Sr.'s Temple, Texas, home with its National Preservation Honor Award. Wilson was the founder of Wilsonart International, and his suburban residence "was a testing ground for his products: From shower stalls to kitchen walls, the surfaces were personally tested by Wilson for durability and colorfastness," according to the trust, a nonprofit group dedicated to protecting historic places.
SO MUCH FOR THE HONEYMOON, PART 1 — To DaimlerChrysler AG, whose German parents have removed many of the American executives who rebuilt Chrysler Corp., proving that the much-touted "merger of equals" between the two automakers was anything but.
SO MUCH FOR THE HONEYMOON, PART 2 — To the recently merged compounding and distribution giant PolyOne Corp., whose announced chief, Phillip Ashkettle, stepped down in August as head of M.A. Hanna Co., just days before Hanna's megamerger with Geon Co. was to take effect. Ashkettle, who was to be PolyOne's chairman and chief executive officer, since has sued the firm over the terms of his departure.
TIMING IS EVERYTHING AWARD — To ChemConnect Inc., CheMatch Inc. and Commerx Inc., three polymer-related dot-coms that withdrew plans for initial public offerings this year, after the market's appetite for such operations went south.
WHO'S KIDDING WHOM? AWARD — To Jack Criffield, 27-year executive of Toshiba Machine Co. America, who officially "retired" this summer. But anyone who knows the irrepressible Criffield knows retirement is not a word in his vocabulary.
STIMULATING EXHIBITION AWARD — To Italian machinery maker MIR SpA, which staged provocative "performances" by lithe, lively, scantily clad ladies at its NPE booth that would have made Madonna blush. It's good to know that, when cycle-time arguments fail to close the deal, blatant sex still has a key role to play in the marketing of injection presses.
MY DANCE CARD IS FULL AWARD — To manufacturers' representative Gordon Darling, who deemed the timing right to announce his new equipment-trading Web site, YourMoldingMachine.com, at 11 p.m. Thursday during NPE 2000. Darling held the kickoff in a Chicago hotel suite complete with what he called the best jazz combo in the Windy City. Reporters got to cover the story while swaying to the musical stylings of "Misty."
ODDEST NEW APPLICATION AWARD — To Bodyperks Inc., a Minneapolis company that's using the Web to market what a London newspaper called "the ultimate tool for the flirting woman: fake nipples." One of the designers — a woman — claims she was inspired after wearing shampoo bottle caps under her bra during a birthday celebration.
SECOND-ODDEST NEW APPLICATION AWARD — To inventor Frank Miller, who designed the CB-2000, a plastic chastity belt for men designed to get them through airport security checks without setting alarms jangling. Miller, who was waiting on U.S. Patent Office approval, touted the device for women who want to make sure their husbands are faithful while on business trips.
FALL GUY OF THE YEAR AWARD — To John McDonough, who resigned Nov. 1 as chief executive officer of Newell Rubbermaid Inc. McDonough is the guy who took credit for Newell Co.'s 1998 acquisition of Rubbermaid Inc. Apparently the company's board of directors and shareholders do not forgive or forget.
PLASTICS DREAM-TEAM AWARD — To the three metro-Detroit plastics entrepreneurs who once were stars for the NBA Pistons. This year, former "Bad Boy" Vinnie Johnson joined the group with his JL Automotive LLC, a subcontractor for Lear Corp. Joe Dumars has a majority holding in thermoformer Detroit Technology Inc. and blow molder DuPlast LLC, while Dave Bing's Bing-Lear Manufacturing Group injection molds exterior mirrors.
NEEDLE IN A HAYSTACK AWARD — To the folks searching the eastern Mediterranean for a fugitive 5 million-gallon plastic balloon filled with fresh water. The sausage-shaped vessel broke free from a tugboat five miles from its destination on the island of Cyprus. Fortunately there was no desperate need: When the balloon disappeared, Cyprus was being hammered with a torrential rain.
GILDING THE LILY AWARD — To Howie Nicholsby, heir to Scotland's top kilt-making firm, Geoffrey (Tailor) Highland Crafts, who is using plastics in his strategy to shake up the staid business. Some of his newest creations: lime-green and pink PVC kilts, and traditional-looking tartan versions treated with fluoropolymers to resist stains.
TOP DOGS AWARD — To the plastics companies among the Pennsylvania firms feted Dec. 12 by Gov. Tom Ridge for being on the state's Best 100 Places to Work list. Honorees included Erie Plastics of Corry, Pa.; Bayer Corp. of Pittsburgh, and PolyOne Corp.'s Engineered Films plant in Lebanon, Pa. Those companies, and the hundreds more like them across the country, know that treating employees well is an integral part of customer service.
PLASTICS MADE IT POSSIBLE AWARD — To Ray and Billie Dawson of Mason, W.Va., whose above-ground swimming pool, carport, garage, 1999 Buick LeSabre and 1985 Chevrolet van were destroyed when a CSX train hauling plastic resin and carbon black derailed near their home. One rail car came to rest 15 feet from where 72-year-old Ray Dawson was watching television in his living room.
